So you’ve met a great man, and you’ve got a date lined up – good for you! Best of luck, and here’s hoping it is every bit as fantastic as you hope it will be. Below, you’ll find some helpful tips that will ensure it’s a success, and leads to that all-important second date. These are things you want to avoid. Ready? Let’s get started.
It’s a losing proposition for you, no matter how you slice it. You don’t even need to mention that you “had been seeing someone, until recently.” That’s a given, right? Otherwise, you wouldn’t be on this date with your new man.
At some point, the past relationship question inevitably comes up when you get farther down the road of dating. That’s fine and natural at some point. That “some point,” however, is not, and should never be your very first date.
Think about it. What kind of message does that send to the man you’re currently out on a date with? The more you talk about your ex, the more he’s going to think you’re still hung up on him. Why would he want to invest his time in someone who’s still pining away for the ex? Will you abandon ship if your ex decides he wants you back? That’s what it sounds like from the man’s perspective, so just don’t go there.
The other thing is this, if you bring up your ex, even to trash talk him, the man you’re currently out with is going to wonder if you trash talk HIM to your friends when he’s not around. Again, these are not the messages you want to be sending out, and can quickly spoil what would otherwise be a great first date.
2. No Movies
First dates are all about connecting and getting to know each other better. How can you do that if you’re sitting in a darkened theater with a gazillion other people who will “shush” you if you try to talk! Movie night is awesome in general, but not as a first date.
3. No Expensive Restaurants
A restaurant is fine, as long as it’s quiet, a little intimate, and allows you to talk. The thing is though, keep it light. If you go to a posh restaurant on the first date, it sets an expectation on the man’s part, even if he doesn’t realize it. Save the expensive, extravagant dinners for a bit later on. A first date should be more casual.
4. No Night Clubs
Even if you dearly love going, it’s just not a good first date venue. The main reason is because it’s too loud and there’s too much activity going on around you to really sit down and talking. That’s what it’s going to take to get to know each other. If you get along as well as you hope to, then you can go to the club together on a future date.
5. No Sleepovers
This is true even if you’ve got amazing chemistry. The art of the successful long term relationship depends on making him chase you. If you go from dinner straight to his bed, he’s going to put you in the category of “booty call girl” rather than long term relationship material.
If you’re not looking for a long term relationship, then jumping in the sack with someone you ‘ve got great chemistry with, even if you haven’t known them long is one thing. Just understand that if you do that, the man in question is automatically going to look and think of you differently from then on. It lessens your long term potential in the male mind. You’re too easily caught to be a viable long term prospect.
If you keep those things in mind, odds are that you’ll not only have a fantastic first date, but get asked on a second. Best of luck, and have fun!